Seriously?!?

So my gym finally put some money into re-decorating the place. But, unfortunately, this is the color they decided on for the weight room. Squished smurf, anyone?

Life without a computer sucks.

Ok, so I know it's been a REALLY long time since my last update, but I promise I totally have a good excuse to give to those of you who still bother to look at my poor little blog thingy. You see, it's pretty hard to blog without the use of a computer or internet connection. Why, in this day and age would someone be without such accouterments, you ask?

Well, I'm glad you asked...(ok, so you didn't, but I'm telling you anyway)...

...a while back, I took a trip to go visit family and friends in Phoenix. The trip was nice, at least until I got into a rather irritating and unfortunate argument over the phone on the way home. I tell you that to preface my mindset heading into the events yet to come.

So, flustered and aggravated, I finally reached home and couldn't wait to go inside to unwind and unpack. I set my bag and a few other random things I was carrying with me down on the porch, and slid the key into the lock, unlocked it, and went to turn the knob...which was locked. I should now include the detail that the knob is never something we lock, or even carry a key for. My first thought was that I'd been an idiot and, while leaving the house prior, had locked the knob on my way out. So my mind started to race to think of how I was going to get in.

Locksmith? It'd take too long, and I don't know that they'll even open a front door if you can't prove you live there (my license still has my old address on it)

Pry a window? A possibility...I started around the side of the house to see what might be best option for that idea, not really thinking of the fact that the overhead light was on, which I had turned off...and saw that the blinds in our office were splayed open...and a pair of paintings that we STILL haven't hung up were propped against the hallway.

John was out of town this whole time, so my first thought was that he'd surprised me by coming home early...and was maybe doing some cleaning or something. When I came around to the back door of the office, I saw that it was wide open. Oddly, my computer, and a few odds and ends were sitting next to the door...like they were...about...to...walk.......out........

Call me dense, or maybe it was because my mind was a little clouded from the argument that I'd just finished having over the phone, but it took me this long to finally realize what was going on. Finally realizing it, however, I ran into the house and started yelling in the most butch voice I could muster..."GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE...NOW!" over and over again as I ran from room to room trying to make sure none of the thieves were still inside. I swear I must have looked like Mel Gibson's character in "Signs" when trying to chase off what he thought were pranksters.

When my blood pressure finally came back to normal human levels, I called the police, and started to take inventory of what was gone.

Among the many things those worthless bastards made off with was our wireless router and the other computer. They'd have actually gotten away with the my computer (and countless other things), had I not come home right in the middle of their theft-fest.

So, needless to say, without the router I've been without internet for some time now. So I have to make guest appearances on other people's wireless networks for now to do my blogging, etc.

Despite this, I'm going to do my best to keep up with things again, and restore my life to normalcy of some kind. So thanks again to those of you still checking in on me from time to time, I promise not to fall of the face of the Earth as much anymore.

What rednecks do with their inheritence money...

A while back John and I went to Phoenix to go to a good friend's housewarming party shindig. This particular friend tends to be quite the overachiever when it comes to...well...pretty much anything. As such, he wanted everything to be perfect for the party.

Unfortunately, he also has currently a whole lot on his plate, so when it came time for the party to be about ready to start, he still had a million little things he wanted to finish. Knowing he was likely freaking out about getting things done, I asked if we could do something to help. He asked if we would be kind enough to swing by a store of some kind and grab an X-mas tree stand.

Which leads us to the picture and title of this post. We pulled into the K-mart parking lot and saw this...


Which pretty much made our night! Here was a jacked-up 50's school bus that this colorful pair of rednecks were charging admission to ride around the K-mart parking lot in. Big dorks that we are, we were fascinated by seeing it tear around, burning TONS of fuel and, I'm sure breaking a few noise ordinances.

I think I want one. Even if the guy said it got something like a half mile to the gallon.

LA trippin', part 2: Culture me!

Lest you get to thinking that we're simple-minded rednecks who only get joy from suped-up cars and beer busts, allow me to correct you. We don't drink.

Seriously, though John and I do actually enjoy attending museums that have things of cultural or historic importance in them. After the beer busts and car shows, that is. This time we finally made it to the Getty with our buddy Dan...who is an artsy guy himself. As such, I think we both enjoyed it a little more than John did.

We went to the Getty Villa, which was mostly ancient statues and artifacts. Since I've always been kind of fascinated by Greek statues and art, I was happy to be there. I sometimes wonder if my appreciation for the Greek stuff stems from the blatant homo-eroticism so much of it contains. Which makes me wonder if I should feel so cultured after all if I'm going there for high-brow smut.

I can't remember, but I think the name of the woman who took this picture for us was Ilean.

Me proving that I really don't know what to do with my hands during a picture.

Yes, that IS what you think it is on the front of this odd statue...why is it there? You tell me.

Is it wrong to think that the guys portrayed in a several thousand year old mosaic are hot?

LA trippin', part 1: The Cars!

Vanna bear shows off a cute new glorified golf cart AND his guns at the same time!

Being that John and I are pretty much car nuts, the main reason for our trip to LA was to see the auto show. The weekend we went was the last of it. In fact, we didn't make it there until Sunday, which was the last day of it.

We had alot of fun wandering the various showrooms and looking at some of the new models. My one frustration was that there weren't very many outrageously outlandish concept cars there. I'd been watching coverage of the Tokyo auto show, and had seen some of the neatest stuff Japan's finest could dream up...and didn't really see anything in LA that compared.

Not that there weren't any concept cars to be had, but most of them were kind of a yawn. Models that could very easily see production right now and not make that much of an impact if you saw them driving down the street.

Regardless, fun was had by all...and many pictures were taken. If you want to see more photos, you can see them here.

The new Chevy Volt. As the name might indicate, it's electric! (Boogie-woogie-woogie)

The newest Lambo sled to make you wish you could multiply your salary by about 15.

Something a little more in my price range (but, unfortunately, not size)...the adorable Smart Four Two.

John looking either pensive or famished...I'm not sure which it was at that point.

Billie Jean is NOT my lover.

The thing about flying non-rev (for free, but always standby) is that sometimes you have to make some extremely weird routing to get where you want to go. This past weekend, for example, we wanted to get to LA. But all the flights out of Tucson to LA (and to pretty much everywhere else) were full.

As such, we had to fly to Albuquerque so that we could make it to LA. Which was kind of a pain in the ass...but had we not routed that way, we never would have seen this...



It was plastered right outside the bathrooms in the terminal. You'll have to click on it to better see all the detail...but it was an ad for a gay retirement community in Santa Fe.

Notice the cuddling hot tub guys in the upper right hand corner...and the harsh portrait of Billie Jean King toward the middle.

John and I giggled about that poster for a good half hour.

Just back...

We just got back last night from a trip to LA to see the auto show. It was a good time, and lots of car-related pictures were taken. We also went to the Getty, where lots of statue-related pictures were taken. I still need to go through said pictures and shrink them down for normal consumption, so anticipate a post about all this in the near future complete with photos.

But if I wait until all that is done, I'll let posting slip by for another few days...and I need to get out of that habit.

Now it's time to head to the gym and make up for a week's worth of playing hookie. Being sick can take the motivation out of ya, you know.